Wednesday, February 23, 2011

I give myself a gift, the gift of faith

It's been a year now, since I started to write this blog. It has been a savior accually. Wonderful, amazing, comforting, humbling and  most of all loving.

This was supposed to be a gratitude blog and even though I don't always write on the topic, I hope that the general message of this blog is that we have all a reason to be grateful and I am, always.

One year ago I was so stressed out and unhappy. I felt trapped in life, even though I had it all, so many things going for me. Happily married, nice job, new house... I still have all this but also something more... I had just found kirtan and started feeling curious about the sikh faith. So much lovely kirtan just around the next bend...

I had never tried kundalini yoga, can you believe it? I hardly can't, what a journey this last year have been. How far I have come and how much more that lies ahead to explore. Amazing!

And sikhi...I love it, I have pondered so much and some many times; when are you a sikh? This week, on monday when I started to write on the outlines of this post, it hit me: I think I am one, I am sikh. My eyes teared up as I was smiling, and it is the same now, as I write these words. I find myself smiling most of the times now, that is the big difference. I am so grateful, I have all that had one year ago and this, I feel surrounded by the love from the universe. I am not one to jump into something on a whim, but this is different, this has always been heartfelt from the first lines of gurbani I read. My first hukam, I took it in May 2010,said:
ik oa(n)kaar sath naam karathaa purakh nirabho niravair akaal moorath ajoonee saibha(n) gur prasaadh

One Universal Creator God. Truth Is The Name. Creative Being Personified. No Fear. No Hatred. Image Of The Undying. Beyond Birth. Self-Existent. By Guru's Grace
Is this beautiful or what? How amazing is it that my first hukam was this? I am in love...

But don't be fooled, I don't wear a turban (ok, sometimes at home), I don't leave all my hairs alone (but a lot of it is as it was created though, I have thought a lot of the concept of kesh), I don't own a wooden comb, I don't have kachera or a kirpan. But I do have a kara and I wear it every day and I have done since it became mine in December. But I am, as I'm sure you understand, not a baptised sikh. I am a newbie-sikh! I am so proud, happy and just amazed of it all. And grateful,so grateful I don't know where to start...

Maybe it is hard to understand, and not a big deal for anyone but me, but for me this is huge. I feel like this is a big birthday gift, I give myself the gift of having faith, of being a sikh.

I so hope no one takes offence of this post, if I got something wrong.

Love and life,

4 comments:

  1. Waheguru ji ka khalsa! Waheguru ji ki fateh!

    It is so amazing. This month is also my one year anniversary of walking the sikh path. I don't think I had really made the timeline connection before.

    Happiest of Happy Birthdays to you dear Sister!! and Chardi Khala for the journey ahead!

    Rae

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  2. Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh! I feel right there with both of you! Next month is my anniversary of my first Kundalini yoga experience and first contact with sikhi. I feel so blessed to be a part of this wave of souls finding this particular path. I feel so blessed to walk it together with you! It's the subtle inner shifts that often run the deepest; I totally agree with you that this is huge. And wonderful! I'm so happy for you.

    Sat Nam and ever-rising spirit!

    Saranpreet

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  3. Thank you both for your comments!

    It's magical that we are where we are, right here right now. Thank you for sharing!

    Sat nam,

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  4. God has given me both of you. I'm so grateful...

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